you had to be there

November 18 was one of the best days of 2010. It started early. Around 5:15 am I woke up and showered and drove to the Cine Capri at Tempe Marketplace to meet up with Buster. The occasion? A Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 midnight showing. (Yes, I skipped work and waited in line about 18 hours to see a movie, and it wasn't even Star Wars.)

(Spoiler alert: if you haven't seen the movie or read the book and plan on doing either and don't want the ending/middle ruined for you, stop reading here.)

Ben and I in SpiritHood mode. That morning some news guy thought my fox hood was part of a Harry Potter costume, partly because when he asked who I was dressed up as, I lied and told him I was Fenrir Greyback, a werewolf. I said what I thought the guy wanted to hear so I would get on TV. It worked because whatever station it was showed a clip of my interview later that night. Also, I stole this picture from Laura. Thanks, Laura.

During the movie I sat between Ben and Buster. We were all enjoying the film, and enjoying being around so many friends (Afton and I bought 30 tickets between the two of us). At the end of the movie, Dobby, a heroic house elf, rescues Harry and friends from the clutches of evil. Sadly, Dobby is killed in the process. Just after the daring rescue, Harry sits on a beach and holds Dobby and mourns the death of his friend. At that moment, Harry's friend Luna reaches over to close the gaping eyes of the now dead Dobby. As Luna does so, Ben leans over and whispers to me, mimicking Dobby's childlike elf voice, "I'm not quite dead yet!"

I -- lost it.

At that point in my life, there had never been anything quite so funny. I started laughing. It was an I've-been-awake-for-over-20-hours, it's-almost-3:00-am kind of laugh. And then Buster started laughing. Ben started laughing. Behind us, Matt started laughing. At the same time a cacophony of "ssshhhhhh!"-ing erupted from the row in front of us.

For a brief second, not wanting to ruin the movie for those around me, I regained composure and controlled my laughter. And then my thoughts returned immediately to Ben's comment and the laughter started again, this time as a soft chortle that quickly developed into an obnoxious giggle. Ben and Buster, who had both since stopped, couldn't contain themselves either and they joined in.

The cycle continued at least one more time until we were finally able to regain control of ourselves and settle down. But at that point the movie was just about over.

== == == == ==

This July my sister Marianne will be part of the cast of the Hill Cumorah Pageant (if you're like me and you're not a fan of websites that automatically play music/audio, then turn your speakers down/off because this one does). Our church has put on the pageant since 1935, so it's a great opportunity for my sister and it's a great opportunity for my family to fly out to see her in the pageant.

I'm a little sad, though. Sad because the day we fly out to see her is the day my friends will be waiting in line to see Deathly Hallows: Part 2. Don't get me wrong, I'm more than excited to take this trip with my family -- we're also making stops in Montreal and New York City. I just wish that on July 15, 2011, I could be in two places at once.

how I live or die

Once every few months I wake up in the middle of the night and I can't get back to sleep. It's been one of those nights (well, it's almost 5:00 a.m., so I guess it's been one of those mornings). Usually, I'll wake up and then worry that I won't be able to fall back asleep -- and ironically, said worrying will keep me from sleeping. But tonight (this morning) there are three thoughts that are occupying my attention and keeping me from sleep -- only two of which are worth worrying about but probably not worth losing sleep over -- but alas, here I am unable to sleep. But this post is about none of those things.

== == == == ==

I wasn't born in Arizona but I proudly claim it as my home. The way I feel about Arizona is similar to how Texans feel about Texas. What others say about my state -- be it positive or negative -- I take personally.

This weekend some distant friends from my college days (I say that like they were so long ago) were in town visiting. It warmed my heart to hear them speak positively about this state I love so much.

== == == == ==

There's a saying in the church I belong to -- said mostly in jest -- that a single man aged 25 or older is a menace to society. The following is a tale of how six young men gave evidence to that theory.

A couple months ago -- I'm fairly sure it was back in October -- a few friends and I decided to take up a new hobby: model rocketry. At the time, I wasn't terribly close to any these guys. I had known most of them for a couple years but hadn't had the opportunity to bond with any of them on a deeper level. On this particular night we ended up launching rockets at one of the baseball fields at Mountain View High School.

After a good hour or two -- it had to be around 10:30 p.m. at this point -- we got a little bored with traditional rocket launching. We started launching off rocket engines by themselves, sans rocket. At one point, we duct taped two engines to a glow stick and attempted to ignite both engines simultaneously. We laughed in hearty delight at the result.

At this point we decided it was as good a time as any to call it a night (and we had just launched off our last rocket engine). As we were packing up and responsibly cleaning up our trash, we heard the rattle and clang of a chain link fence about a hundred yards away. I assumed it was another party who wanted to use the field for their own mischievous means and who was I to deny them so I ignored the noise and went back to my cleaning.

Seconds later we saw a dark figure approaching us at a run. The figure yelled, "Mesa Police! Get on the ground!"

If I could roll my eyes with my whole body, it was with that attitude that I took a seat on the grass. For the next hour four or five police officers (they all had nothing better to do) explained to us the nature of our wrongdoings. How model rocketry, while not expressly illegal, was nevertheless an unsavory hobby. How the school could press charges for our having apparently trespassed. How we as 'adults' should be ashamed of ourselves.

The school didn't press charges though I don't think I would've minded if they had -- you can't put a price on friendship and any fine I would've had to pay would've made the bond I formed that night with those guys that much deeper.

== == == == ==

It's hard to explain group dynamics and friendship. I've always been blessed with great friends (I'd like to cite the previous story as evidence). It's funny because as I kid I was more content to stay at home and play legos and watch cartoons on TV. Now I feel like I can't do anything alone.

It's strange how group dynamics change. You get close to people -- collectively and individually -- and then suddenly things are different. So-and-so starts dating someone and they don't come around as much. Someone gets a new job so they hang out less. Circumstances change and you just don't see a valued friend that much anymore. For the individual, these changes are usually for the better and I certainly don't begrudge the changes or the individual.

I feel like I live or die by my friends, be they far away or close by. It might seem weak to rely on other people so much. It's not that I don't believe in myself (though to be honest, I have my doubts more often that I'd like to admit). I guess the older I get the more I believe in mutual strength -- that strength comes from reaching out -- not from looking in. I'm trying really hard to act on that belief.

Weezer 2010: too little, too late?

Whenever I blog about Weezer it always ends up being a long rant that I feel like no one would care about reading but me and I end up deleting it before I finish. This may turn into that. But so be it, because maybe I just need to get it out of my system.

- - - - -

Nostalgia is so in right now. And Weezer seems to be capitalizing on it. A few weeks ago Weezer released a single called "Memories" from their new album Hurley (this might be their best album cover yet), due out September 14. The song details the band's exploits during their early days and reaches levels of fuzz and rock rarely, if ever, seen in Weezer's past decade (could this be due to the band recently signing to Epitaph?).

If that's not enough, the band is set to release not one, but two throwback albums during the month of November. The first is called Death To False Metal... A Collection Of Unheard Songs From The Weezer Vault (previously titled Odds and Ends -- though I'm curious to know how much of this collection is actually 'unheard' -- old demo Weezer tracks weren't hard to find online in the early '00s).

The second album is a two-disc deluxe version of the fan favorite Pinkerton. Though I'm pretty positive I've heard every song that will be on the 'deluxe' portion of this album I'm nevertheless excited for it because a.) my Pinkerton CD skips like nobody's business and I feel cheap rocking a burned copy; after all, it is one of my top three favorite albums; and, b.) they might release it on vinyl (although I already have an import version of Pinkerton on vinyl). In addition to all this Pinkerton goodness, hardcore fans can purchase a three-disc 'superdeluxe' version of Pinkerton that includes the third installment of Rivers' Alone series (Alone is a collection of Rivers' home-recorded demos; two Alone albums have been released so far).

In sum, we're being bombarded with five albums worth of Weezer in the span of less than two months.

- - - - -

When Weezer's Pinkerton was released in 1996 I had just turned 14. I bought the album a couple weeks after it was released; I found it in the used section at Sam Goody for $9.00. I remember listening to the album the next day while working on my bike in the garage. I didn't hate it, but I didn't get it -- the rough guitars, the raw, intimate vocals, the raucous, bombastic drumbeats -- it was certainly a change from their debut Blue album. I wasn't surprised that it had ended up in the used section where I found it only a couple weeks after the album was released.

Pinkerton did have one pop gem, however, that kept me coming back to the album during the first year of owning that album: the album's first (and only semi-commercial) single, "El Scorcho." I listened to this song almost every day before school in eight grade. I know this song like I know few things in my life.

When I found out that Weezer would be stopping in Tempe during their Pinkerton tour on December 17, 1996 (I'm pretty sure of this date) I knew I had to go. But, my mom didn't agree with me. She said I was too young to attend such a concert. I was devastated. I remember walking around the block and crying (gimme a break, I was 14) when I found out I couldn't go.

I didn't see Weezer live till 2000 at the Warped Tour in 'lovely' Chula Vista, CA, with Danny, Joby, and Jeff, as evidenced in this charming photograph -- a story for a different blog post, perhaps.

Like I said, I didn't quite 'get' Pinkerton when it was first released. In time, though, I came to regard it as work of masterful genius and my love for it even surpassed that of the Blue album.

- - - - -

A week or so ago MTV News caught wind from Rivers himself of some news bound to excite even the most cynical Weezer fan: Weezer's plans for a Blue/Pinkerton tour to coincide with the release of the Pinkerton deluxe edition.

Attending a Weezer concert where they play nothing but songs from Blue and Pinkerton is something I've dreamed of since 1996. So why am I not jumping up and down and peeing my pants with joy?

I just revisited a blog post from almost two years ago wherein I describe my excitement and elation at the announcement of Jimmy Eat World's Clarity tour.

So why doesn't the announcement of a Blue/Pinkerton tour illicit a similar emotional response? Here I am, I'm not even a cynical Weezer fan and I refuse to let myself get excited. What did me in? Was the Raditude straw that broke the camel's back? (I do love a few songs on that album -- I just have an impossible time hanging with tracks like "Love is the Answer" and "In the Mall.")

Where was Weezer two years ago when Jimmy Eat World was announcing their Clarity tour and paying back the devotion of their longtime fans with the gift of a lifetime? Is Weezer's potential Blue/Pinkerton tour too little, too late?

Don't get me wrong. I still love Weezer. You know I'll be in the front row of whatever Blue/Pinkerton show I can get to (which will probably be in California because I doubt a tour like this will come to Phoenix). Maybe the Blue/Pinkerton tour is just what I need to rekindle my love for Weezer... a love that has been ever more fleeting in the recent years.

...maybe.

Perseid power

Late Wednesday evening I embarked on a nocturnal photogging journey with my buddy Seanathon Tedwerd and a new friend, Caleb. The following photo resulted:



The purpose of the journey was to take star trail photos and view the Perseids meteor shower. We were successful on both accounts.

We ended up finding the perfect spot to take photos -- a small dirt road connecting Power Road and the Beeline Highway that passed at the foot of Red Mountain (is that even the real name of the mountain?). The headlights in Sean's van threatened to cut out several times but that only contributed to the spirit of adventure and camaraderie.

With work in the morning, I didn't get home to 3:30 a.m. -- it was worth it.

Arizona's Eyjafjallajökull

I paid an unexpected visit to the Grand Canyon last Sunday night and all I came away with was this photo:



I'd've liked a more in-focus background but when you're in an empty, secluded parking lot late at night in Northern Arizona you start worrying about skinwalker attacks -- not a terribly conducive atmosphere for making sure your camera is in focus.
I was driving home from Utah when I was forced to make a bit of a detour because of forest fires just north of Flagstaff. Here's my route:



Who needs a fancy Mac or Photoshop when you have Microsoft Paint? Best image-editing software out there. Period.
My detour took me past the Grand Canyon. I'm a pretty in-the-zone traveler and I was already behind schedule but if people come from around the world to see the Grand Canyon, I might as well stop and snap a pic. So I did.

Symptoms in Some Cephalopods Approximating Apoplexy

So apparently I used to blog. It's not that I haven't had anything to blog about -- AZ's immigration law, feelings on leaving Colorado and moving to Arizona, books I've read recently (I, Robot, The Trial, Catch-22), the LOST season finale, book(s) I'm reading now (Sweet Thursday -- welcome back Mr. Steinbeck), my new job, friends, family, et cetera and so on (strangely music wasn't included on that list... I need new tunes). I've been adjusting to some recent life changes and blogging has fallen by the wayside.

So be it. Life is good and if a good life doesn't include as much blogging as it used then, well, so be it.

I do, however, hope to blog more because in the past it's been a way for me to discover things about myself that I don't necessarily find out until I write them down (since I'm too lazy too keep a journal and vain enough to want others to know about the inner workings of my brain (or more accurately, the lack thereof)).

Arizona has been treating my well since I've moved back (already four weeks ago, wow). I'm glad I'm finally getting settled down enough where I'm starting to develop routines and itching to pick up neglected hobbies (sadly, I haven't touched my camera since I've been back).

I love the summer. Even when it's 107 outside (although this weekend has been supernal -- yesterday's high of 85 was downright refreshing and today's 91 felt wonderful). No doubt I'll be sick of the heat by August. But then I'll remember how the month of October in other states (*cough* Idaho, Colorado *cough*) is worse than Arizona's January and the sweltering heat won't seem so bad.

I hope I'm here to stay.

expatriate

Sometimes I feel like a man without a country.

I can feel them pulling away as I'm resigned to stay the same

I feel like there is a distance growing between my family and me. I'm the only one who doesn't live in Arizona. When I stop and think about it, it seems kinda random to realize that I'm in Colorado when my whole family is in AZ. When I retrace the steps that brought me here it makes sense and I understand why I'm here, but that doesn't always make it easy to be away.

I miss 'em and I sort of feel like I'm missing out on things, especially now that my brother is home from his mission. Sure, when I was away from home for school I missed them then but I thought that my being away from them was temporary because college is temporary. After each semester of school, I returned to AZ for a few weeks at a time, sometimes for over a month. When I was going to school, I didn't plan on moving back to AZ immediately but I just didn't realize that there would be a time when I wouldn't be going back to AZ every three months. Well, I did realize that, I just didn't understand the implications.

I have a buddy who is a cadet at the Air Force Academy just north of Colorado Springs. He graduates from the Academy in May and he's planning on spending some time in Tunisia with the Air Force to learn French before he heads to flight school in the fall in Florida. I'm kinda sad that I can't really get away with something like that anymore. I have a "career job" now and I think the time in my life where I have the freedom to go live somewhere random for a few months has passed. While the experience of living somewhere like Tunisia would be pretty rad in itself, what interests me more about such an adventure would be eliminating some of the ties I have now. Because I feel like cutting myself loose would allow me to feel close to my family and friends and everything I'm missing right now.

P.S. Happy 100th post, Myke.

absence makes the heart grow fonder

Today is a special day. Sure, today is Valentine's Day but you can hardly call a holiday that celebrates contrived love a special day. Today marks the 98th year of existence of our nation's finest state: Arizona.


Circa November 2008, 6:00 a.m., Billy, Dan and I, on our way from Rexburg to Las Vegas.

Saving the best for last, Arizona was admitted to the Union on February 12, 1912, as the 48th state.

I love my desert.

Here are some fun Arizona facts:

- The saguaro cactus -- the large iconic, tree-sized cacti in the picture above -- is native to Arizona (though very small populations have been found on the edges of New Mexico, California, and Mexico).

- Arizona has had more female governors than any other state.

- The cities of Mesa, Chandler, and Gilbert were all listed in Forbes' "America's 10 Most Boring Cities" (although Gilbert is actually a town, not a city). Clearly, here there is more than meets the eye.

- Some of the greatest people in the world -- namely my family and many of my friends -- live there.

- The Grand Canyon. Yeah, that's in Arizona.

- Area-wise, Arizona is the sixth largest state.

- The official state neckwear of Arizona is the bolo tie.

- I daresay that Arizona has the raddest flag in the nation.

- The average high for Phoenix in January is 67°. I really don't know how to beat that.

Happy 98th birthday, Arizona! I love you and I miss you.

make it mine, 2009

(I meant to post this before 2010 rolled around... better late than never, right?)

I don't think 2009 could've gotten off to a better start. Exhibit A:


The stern look on my face was hardly indicative of the general mood of 2008's New Year's Eve. Jackie's face (foreground right) is a fair representation of what was really going inside my heart/head. It's been so long since I've had such a fun-filled New Year's: rocking to Styx (!) with best friends, heckling drunks on the free light rail, consuming chocolate chip pancakes, and coining the official slogan of 2009... all in one night (this year was fun too, but let's be honest, it'll be quite a while before NYE 2008 is beaten). The following are how I will remember Make It Mine, 2009:

January: California
On the way back to BYU-I for my very last semester, I took the scenic route with Leah through California on our way back to Idaho (emphasis on scenic). We met up with Harper in Bakersfield and drove up through Salinas and Monterey... Leah and Harper were kind enough to humor my John Steinbeck obession, which resulted in this picture:


Relaxing on the steps of John Steinbeck's boyhood home in Salinas, CA. The next morning we made our way up through San Francisco, and we finished the day/night with a drive through northern Nevada to Utah (the only crappy part of the trip).

March: Jimmy Eat World Clariy Tour
No need for detail here since a perusal of previous posts will provide more than you would care to even read. What other band would devote a tour to playing one of their more obscure, less commercially successful albums in its entirety?

April: Graduation
Have you ever woken up on the morning of your birthday and your dad or whoever asks you how it feels to be a year older? And you think about it and you realize that you feel the same as you did the day before? That's what graduating college was like. Sure, it was nice, I got a few gifts and some extra attention -- just like a birthday -- but I sure didn't feel any different or smarter when I left Rexburg on April 9, 2009.

Had I known how much I would miss my friends and how much I would pine for college life in the months to come, I probably would've had to have been forcibly removed. Instead, I was all too glad to pack up my car with little regard of when I would see Rexburg again.

April: Wolverine Premiere
Hugh tells the best jokes.


May: Colorado
I moved to Colorado. For a few months I really hated my life.

August: Reunion Show and Emiglio Launch
I spent all of high school and a big chunk of my post-mission life playing in a rock band... so naturally I was excited that the stars aligned so well to allow a TMP/xyzebra/Felix/The Headline is Dead reunion show (TMP was my high school band; if a band could have a best friend then Felix was TMP's best friend; xyzebra was a synthesis of TMP and Felix, both in style and band members). While this show alone would be noteworthy in itself, it's how the night ended that really made it so memorable.


Earthbound but aspiring: When I tell people how we launched Emiglio (Whit's pet robot and xyzebra's mascot) into the outer limits of Earth's atmosphere with a weather balloon I generally get one of two reactions: a.) "Oh, that sounds like it was a lot of fun," or b.) "Why would you do that?" Regardless of how people react I've given up on trying to explain the bittersweet feeling we all experienced while watching Emiglio soar among the stars... the closest I can come to explaining how we felt is found in a song -- go listen to "Ara Batur" by Sigur Ros starting at about 4:45 till the end of the song... triumphant melancholy.

September/October: Sunny Day Real Estate Reunion Tour
I didn't go to too many shows in 2009 but the ones I did go to were some heavy hitters. A SDRE reunion had been rumored for some time so I was surprised -- and delighted -- when it actually happened. I was fortunate enough to attend two of their shows, in Denver and Seattle. During the tour they debuted a new song, "10"... perhaps a good sign that they not quite ready to call it quits again...

2009: Regret
I keep coming back to the lyrics of "Fight Test":

I thought I was smart
I thought I was right
I thought it better not to fight
I thought there was a virtue
In always being cool
So it came time to fight
I thought I'll just step aside
And that the time would prove you wrong
And that you would be a fool

Remember at the beginning of last year when everybody was posting those "25 things about me" lists on Facebook? The last entry on my list read, "I'm not one to regret much of anything...." People who have no regrets either have life figured out or suffer from chronic apathy.

For to lose I could accept
But to surrender I just wept
And regretted this moment
Oh, and that I was the fool

I certainly was the fool to think that I could live my life so perfectly that I would regret almost nothing. I'm so grateful for regret because it means -- hopefully -- that I won't make the same idiotic mistakes I made in 2009.

the table and the light

Right now, a lucky few hundred in Phoenix are about to enjoy something special:


While a live Reuben's Accomplice performance is rare and certainly special, it's the 'special guests' that really excite me. The following tweet (wow, that just sounds so dumb) was hyperlinked on Modified Arts' website in reference to these special guests:


Jimmy Eat World for $5 at Modified? What is this, 1999? Because that was the last time I saw JEW at that price and at such an intimate venue.

The current temperature of -1°F is one thing to deal with but missing this is another indeed.

On the bright side, Jimmy Eat World has been working with Mark Trombino -- who produced Static Prevails, Clarity, Bleed American and Stay On My Side Tonight -- on a set of new songs.

how Myke got his groove back

Turns out is was right here all along:

When I returned to the glorious homeland this weekend for Thanksgiving I was slightly nervous that I wouldn't enjoy being in Arizona as much as I used to. I even mentioned to a friend that I was afraid that I was losing a bit of my Arizona-ness.

Then late Friday night on the way to Applebee's with Matt, Whit and Rachael, I caught myself feeling something I haven't felt in a quite while. I felt comfortable, I felt that I belonged. But really, it was more what I wasn't feeling that stood out. I didn't feel a desire to be aloof from my surroundings; this vague, constant nagging doubt that I've apparently grown accustomed to and oblivious of was absent. In short, I felt like it would be OK if I were to sprout roots and let them grow. As if almost everything I really needed -- close family and friends who really get me -- were in that car with me.

I've lived, more or less, in four different states -- Arizona, Idaho, California, and Colorado -- in a fewer amount of years. After bouncing around and back and forth for a while you get used to preparing for the next phase of your life, you get used to living out of boxes. It was nice to not feel that for a few days.

My Arizona batteries are recharged and I can't wait to be back for Christmas.

the grass is always greener

Be it known that I do like Colorado. Although my relationship with her has been at times adversarial.
+I have really great friends here, the type I normally might not have befriended otherwise. For example, my friend Sara was in my singles ward in Arizona for a while; we never really talked to each other then because we had our own groups of established friends. I move to Colorado and she's in my ward and we've become good friends. Small world. Interestingly, most of my close friends here are from Arizona and Idaho. The others have either lived in Arizona or are thinking about moving there.
+I've learned a lot about the military... Colorado Springs is a military town, home to Fort Carson (Army), Peterson Air Force Base (Air Force, duh), and the US Air Force Academy. One of my good friends is a green beret and two more are Air Force cadets. It's interesting to hear their take on Iraq and other military matters.
+The weather in the summer is (mostly) fantastic.
-The weather this weekend has been nothing short of terrible. I spent about an hour collectively today and yesterday scraping ice off my car -- the first sign of what is supposed to be a 'long winter'.
+I have a job that pays me money. I'm lucky and grateful to have one because some people don't.
-I don't always love my job.
-My options for grad school in Colorado Springs are pretty limited -- UCCS (doesn't have the degree I want) and various online universities (not my style).
-I'm 12 hours from home. SLC is nine hours away but that's a lot of driving time to justify a weekend road trip.
+I get to do a bit of travelling for work.
+I've been able to explore hobbies and interests I might not have taken as much time for elsewhere. (I kinda wanna learn to sew... amongst other things.)
-I've met very few people who share my enthusiasm for music, at least when it comes to live shows and/or the kind of music I prefer. And all the good shows are in Denver... going alone + long drive = less likely that I'll end up going.
-Interesting girls are few and far between and/or they go to school somewhere else and are just in town for the summer (which is now over).
+Casa Bonita is only an hour away.
+Denver is growing on me. And it's a pretty cheap airport to fly out of.
+Colorado Springs has some of the best thrifts stores I've been to in years. I could devote, and have considered doing so, an entire blog post to my amazing thrift store finds. From cameras to t-shirts to turntables to dishes to just about everything else. And most are half-off on Saturdays.

I really, really, really miss Arizona and Idaho. Yes, Idaho too. It's strange... because some of the things that I dislike about both places have become endearing now that I'm not there to hate them. Arizona is insanely hot in the summer, then just 'normal' hot in the fall and spring... but, you know what to expect -- your travel plans are never upset due to weather and you never have to scrape ice off your car. Rexburg is a one thrift-store town devoid of record stores and authentic foreignness but its petit size makes for a great social environment. Somehow the things you hated have become the things you now miss.

I just wonder what I'll end up loving about Colorado that I just don't like right now. Leaving my college life behind was one of the most soul-mangling experiences of my life and it continues to be so, though to a (much) lesser degree. But the self-discovery and growth (hopefully permanent) that have come as a result is so invaluable.

Ultimately, I wonder if this is a pit stop on my way to somewhere else or if this is the 'somewhere else'. I wonder if I should be planting roots or getting to ready to sow elsewhere. Because sometimes the grass is always greener but sometimes it really is greener.

play my little part in something big

After an eventful weekend in Arizona, I feel like I have a lot to blog about...

Our marathon band practice that spanned two bands and two days:



An extremely well planned and executed reunion show rife with nostalgia, free cookies, and the loudest, proudest rock n' roll Sweet Cakes has ever seen:






Launching Emiglio into the farthest reaches of our fair Earth's atmosphere via weather balloon:




And as collectively and individually awesome all of these things were, they would have been meaningless without these folks:


Friends.

Bro Hymn Tribute

I was going through some old pictures today and I thought I would post some. This will be kinda long, so settle in.


We used to have rock and roll practice at Whit's house. We ended up spending lots of time there. I ended up sitting on his bed a lot. I ended up wearing his sombrero. Someone ended up taking a picture of me wearing it. The picture ended up black and white and slightly out of focus.


Check out this hard guy: Jeff Stock, in the flesh. Or actually represented as a series of 1s and 0s that results in this blurry nostalgic photo. Jeff and I have been hanging since seventh grade. I'll never forget the day he drank too much Sunny D at lunch just so he could throw up on Mr. Valencia's furniture. Classic.


L to R: Whit "The S**t" Gardner (no one calls him that -- I just had to give him a nickname cuz Devyn has a sweet nickname) and Devyn "D-Rock" Gillespie. This was taken at a hungry party at In-n-Out Burger. Hungry parties are where we go to a restaurant when we're hungry and then we eat so we're not hungry anymore.


David Lowery at same hungry party. He's just as often known as Fatcat as he is by his Biblical given name. This guy is my hardest. If everyone had a friend like him a great deal of the world's problems would disappear. This guy has had my back more times than I can even remember. I could write a book about it. As a matter of fact, we've been meaning to put together a scrapbook chronicling our exploits, adventures, and plunders. He's headed off to BYU-H this fall and I can't wait to visit him.


Matthew "Manwhore" Olsen. He's my brother. Here he is posing in our father's leather jacket he got when he used to sell franchises for Money Mailer. This picture was taken by the legendary Seanathon Tedwerd Huntington at a show/dance party held at his mother's too-legit-to-quit sandwich/cookie shop, Sweet Cakes, in d-town Mesa. Some of the best dance parties/band shows in the Valley of the Sun have occurred at this place.

One of my favorite memories of Matt was when I was a 9th grader and he was a 7th grader at Charles D. Poston Junior High School, home of the Panthers. Like most junior highs we had a weekly spirit day where students were encouraged to dress a certain theme to show their school spirit. One Wednesday it was 70s day at PJHS (good thing we weren't Poston Middle School, right?). As my friends and I gathered at our regular morning hang out spot, we spied Matt with one of his friends, Kyle I believe, from afar. Matt and Kyle stuck out because they weren't dressed as the other high-spirited students, clad in bell-bottoms, polyester shirts, and afro wigs. No, Matt and Kyle were dressed as high-spirited pirates. When asked why he chose to spend 70s day in such attire, he simply replied, "They never specified which century!" This is typical of Matt's sense of humor and personality.


This is my older brother Spencer and me. Bet you can't guess who is who (if the forest of auburn arm hair doesn't give it away... ). To know Spencer is to love Spencer. He has a way of magnetizing people toward him and making them feel good about themselves. I'm not joking when I say he was probably the most popular kid at school when he was a senior and I was a sophomore, my first year of 'real' high school. At least to me it seemed like he was. Naturally, I felt pretty cool in a place where I was seemingly uncool when his equally good-natured friends would say "What's up Olsen" to me in passing on the way to class.


The one and only Trevor Denton. Some gnarly dude named Paul taught me how to play the guitar but Trev taught me how to rock. Trev joined the Manhattan Project when the rest of us (Jeff, Devyn and I) were in 11th grade and Trev was in 10th. He brought a much needed boost to our live shows, rhythm section (he played bass) and background vox (that means "vocals" if you aren't too band savvy; not to be confused with the British amp-maker). Trev was known to swing from the pipes protruding from the ceiling during the shows we played at the Nile. One time at the same venue he and I got into a jumping contest -- he knocked me off the stage. Not as dramatic as it sounds but it was funny.


This is my former pet, a desert tortoise named Joanie (short for Joan of Arc). Sadly, I had to leave her behind when I moved to Idaho for school; desert tortoises aren't allowed to leave Arizona. Anyway, as you can see, she's totally awesome. She probably would've outlived me.


This one's for the ladies: Meet Emiglio, seen here pumping iron. A space traveler from the Galilean moon Ganymede (Jupiter III), he's best known as the famed mascot of the band xyzebra. Like E.T., Emiglio misses the vast expanses of space, and because he means so much to us, Whit and I spent the better part of our work day today texting back and forth devising a way to return him to outer space. Emiglio's tentative launch date is 8 August, 2009. You are all invited to attend (venue and entertainment TBA). Also, don't be surprised/shy if he tries to add you as a friend on Facebook.


My post-mission band xyzebra was a very do-it-yourself type of band. As a result, I ended up making many of our flyers. I'm by no means an artist or graphic designer but I had a lot of fun making them and I miss doing so. You'll notice Love You Longtime on this flyer. This was before I had seen them in Rexburg, and before I even considered going to BYU-I (I would've laughed in your face had you told me I'd end up there -- though I'm very glad/blessed I did). Anyawy, LYL played a pretty awesome rendition of Kip Dynamite's "I Love Technology" at this show.


Another testament of xyzebra's DIY-ness, this is Batmannequin, whose full name -- say it out loud -- is Batmannequinskywalertexasranger... it actually goes on longer than that I just can't remember it (Jeff or Trev, if you read this help a brother out). I drew this for a t-shirt design.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this merry jaunt down my memory lane as much as I did. Chances are you didn't because most of you who read this don't know these folks, but that's OK. The guys I've mentioned in this blog I've been friends with since our high school and junior high days (exceptions are Matt, Spencer and Fatcat: I've known Matt for his entire life, Spencer's know me for all of mine, and Fatcat and I go back to early '05). A few of these guys have since gotten married... I think sometimes when your friends get married there's this idea that your friendship will suffer or be less satisfying as a result. Actually, the opposite has been true. Anyway, I'm grateful to have -- seriously -- the best friends in the world.

My Fidelity

The first time I went to Stinkweeds I was 16. Despite being of age, I had yet to experience that teenage rite of passage that is obtaining a driver's license. So, a few of us convinced our otherwise ignored friend Dustin to drive us down there in his mom's Chevy Astro van. To a group of sheltered teens from Mesa, Arizona, an afternoon excursion to neighboring Tempe was more like a trip to a underdeveloped foreign land; and this trip in particular was fraught with third-world danger when Dustin decided to drive in the wrong lane of traffic through the eternal construction zone known as Apache Boulevard. Ironically the goods we sought were a product of four Mesa boys who had grown in suburbs not unlike, and not far from, our very own.

Really, for me this trip was a series of firsts: my first independent record store experience, my first outing to Tempe sans parents, and the first time I heard mention of the term "EP". The EP in question was an obscure self-titled release from Mesa's own Jimmy Eat World -- a sort of sonic appetizer, released to simultaneously tide us over and whet our appetites for their upcoming full-length album, Clarity. I can't remember who all came; most likely Jeff and Devyn (we no doubt had forgone band practice that day) and probably Erich since Dustin drove us.

Our first Stinkweeds experience was apparently a pleasant one, as we made a habit of going back frequently -- when we could find someone to drive us, that is. My second or third time there I bought How It Feels to Be Something On by Sunny Day Real Estate at the suggestion of Jeff's brother Randy. I hated it.* When finally we were able drive to Tempe on our own, we often combined our outings to Stinkweeds with a stop at Sub Factory, maybe the best bread on a sub you've tasted.

== == == == ==

It took a while before I understood the term "music snob" -- a person who has no desire to share music, be it by means of suggesting bands or albums, through loaning of CDs, or through the swapping of electronic media. However, it's not one's actions that make a music snob, but the motives behind the actions. This person refuses to share simply because knowing more hip bands than you will make him or her cooler than you. In other words, a music snob is a person who hoards music, to the extent that such a thing is possible.

Let me throw this out there: I am not a music snob. At least not in the general sense. Or in any sense for that matter, but I'll let you be the judge of that after you read what I have to say.

== == == == ==

Stinkweeds in Tempe was sandwiched between a bartending academy and Pita Jungle, one of the finest restaurants in the greater Phoenix metropolitan area. In April 2006 I heard a rumor that the Tempe location would be closing and the owner would be selling Tempe's inventory to an unrelated party in Salt Lake City, Utah, where a new record store would be opening. By this time, Stinkweeds had opened a second location in Phoenix, so when I heard about the liquidation of the Tempe store I wasn't as distraught as I should have been.

== == == == ==

I have a hard time downloading music. Of course I am technologically savvy, and I know how to download music. Maybe it's because during the years wherein I formed my musical tastes downloading music, whether legally or illegally, wasn't really an option; cable modems and the hard drive-friendly mp3 format were technological breakthroughs and therefore rare, instead of the norm. In sum, maybe I'm a simple creature of habit when it comes to procuring new tunes.

Or maybe I like the feel a of CD spanning my middle finger and thumb, and perhaps I enjoy browsing the liner notes, deciphering unintelligible lyrics and perusing the thank you list. Better yet, maybe I enjoy delicately placing the needle on a new vinyl, and maybe I love the subtly accentuated and unparalleled sound quality of wax.

Similarly, I don't seem to appreciate music when I don't purchase it. Maybe there's something to be said for giving something up and getting something in return. Is money not our recompense when we give up a portion of our time and talents -- a piece of ourselves -- to a person or organization? When we make a monetary sacrifice, we're somewhat akin to the musicians who give up a piece of themselves in the songs they craft. If sacrifice gives meaning and appreciation to life, it certainly does to music as well.

== == == == ==

When I was in Salt Lake City at the beginning of April I made a point of visiting Slowtrain Records at the suggestion of Zach. I found their CD selection to be somewhat lacking but their impressive array of vinyl made up for that. We didn't have much time to spend for record shopping, so after a quick scan of the LP section I began flipping through 7 inches. It didn't take long for me to notice a round, green handwritten price tag on several of the more obscure, older-looking 7 inches. Its familiarity called for further inspection. Removing a 7 inch from the bin, I read the single word that spanned the top half of the circular price tag: "Stinkweeds." I had suspected that Slowtrain was the reincarnation of the old Tempe location of Stinkweeds, and now I had proof.

This discovery caused a subtle tearing in my heart**: at first, it was a feeling of superiority -- as if I belonged to an exclusive group. Next I felt annoyed -- annoyed that something so holy could be paraded in front those who had not experienced nor could appreciate the glory that was Stinkweeds Tempe -- my pearls thrown before the veritable swine.***

== == == == ==

I've since repented of my snobbish feelings. But I won't repent of my love for record stores and their produce. Music plays an important role in my life and -- for better or worse -- it helps define it. My fidelity -- it's worth the sacrifice.



* Present day, this might be my favorite of their four albums.
** Sunny Day Real Estate pun not intended.
*** The coalescence of these feelings must be how a music snob feels when he hears his favorite band on the radio (not that a music snob would be listening to the radio, but still). Oh, and I do not think Slowtrain customers are swine, I just felt the metaphor fit my initial feelings; I love Slowtrain and I always make an effort to shop there whenever I'm in SLC.

song beneath a song

I tend to fall behind on my blogging when I'm at home, mostly because I don't get wireless Internet when I'm at my mom's place and, for whatever reason, I don't like blogging on my mom's computer. But I've had a lot I've wanted to blog about over the past week, so here I am. At the same time, I don't feel like the multiple subjects I've been wanting to blog about are worthy of an entire post; this post will be a collection of smaller ideas and thoughts that may or may not be worthy of an isolated blogging event; I'm combining them in a single post (I love a sentence with more than one semicolon).

So this is kinda long so feel free to go refill your beverage or go to the bathroom.

OK, welcome back.

Bye bye, BYU-I
I graduated. So this particular topic is probably blog worthy of itself, but being that it was such an anticlimactic experience for myself, I'm more than content to keep it to one paragraph. People keep asking me how it feels to be graduated. My response is always something like, "Well, it's nice not to have to get up for class in the morning." Maybe I'd be more excited if I had a job . . . I mean, cuz that's what you go to school for, right?

Universe, you win!
There is an episode of The Office entitled "The Return" where Michael convinces Dwight to come back to work at Dunder Mifflin (sp?) after Dwight is bullied into quitting. At the beginning of the episode Jim -- Dwight's nemesis and antithesis -- says something along the lines of, "Alright Universe, you win! I miss Dwight!" (I tried to find a clip of this on YouTube but to no avail). I'm sure I complained about Rexburg at least once a day during the five semesters I was there (well, maybe not so much in the summer, but I made up for it during the winter months). Then, last night as I was talking to Leah, I realized how much I miss it. Maybe it's the people, maybe it's that the people I love are just beginning what will no doubt be another fun-filled summer semester . . . whatever the case, I miss Rexburg. To Leah, Kari, Zach, Harper, Thome, Ford, Vickie, Nadia, Tori, Amy, Dan, Billy, Erin, and Nudie: I miss you.

TV on DVD
OK, so I was gonna write something about how Heroes season 2 is kinda weak but I just watched an episode that was pretty good so my faith is restored (for now, anyway).

My Hardest
This past week I've enjoyed reconnecting with old friends. As a result, I've picked up some of their lingo, especially in the usage of the words "hard" and "weak". It's common to use these words in their superlative form, combined with a possessive adjective. For example, "Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots is my hardest Flaming Lips album," or "Maladroit is my weakest Weezer album." Anyway, I just wanted to make you aware of this so you understand if I happen to say something along those lines. (The derivation of this form of speech can be traced back to one or two persons; hopefully they won't think I'm a lame poser if I include this in my vernacular.)

"Now, I've been smilin' lately"
It's not a secret that I love Cat Stevens. For this reason, it sometimes hacks me when people rag on him for his conversion to Islam. I realize there is/was some controversy surrounding him for his supposed involvement in and funding of radical terrorist groups. But let's get real, the guy continues to win awards for his humanitarian work; sure, he's not Mother Theresa, but he's no terrorist. It hacks me when people pigeonhole Muslims. It's ironic because of all the people I met on my mission Muslims were often the most sincere, faithful, and open-minded people. They would listen and care when "Christians" would slam the door.

Yusuf Islam is my hardest.

"His eyes closed and he slept."
How awesome is Leah? For a graduation present she gave me this:


Yeah. That's East of Eden, first edition. This book is my hardest; what I love about this battered copy is that it's proof that I'm not the only one who thinks so (either that, or someone let it sit in their attic for a bit too long, as Leah put it). Anyway, I've noticed a general sentiment concerning Leah in the blog world and on Facebook. It seems like people are always quick to point out how pretty she is or how she has great style and dresses nice, etc. While these things are indeed true, I think they are insignificant compared to how thoughtful, caring, and selfless she is. I know I'm not the only one who appreciates this about her; it just makes me think that maybe some people don't know her well enough to realize that her outer goodness is far from being the best thing about her. Anyway, I hope she doesn't hate me for singling her out like this . . . I just thought this was important enough to be said.

my skeptic sight

I should've been in bed an hour or two ago but when I got home for the evening I found myself at http://bsidesrus.blogspot.com/, downloading Jimmy Eat World b-sides from Futures and Chase This Light.

I think I was in 8th grade when I heard JEW (that's how you abbreviate Jimmy Eat World -- I'm not being antisemitic, I'm promise). My older brother Spencer bought a pair of Doc Marten's (after all, it was the 90s, so why not?) and it came with a Capitol Records CD sampler. Jimmy Eat World's "Call It in the Air" was featured on said sampler. As a young junior high schooler I remember hearing talk of Jimmy Eat World, how they were a popular local band, how a few of them had attended the local high school, etc. I was anxious to check them out.

I put my brother's CD sampler in my Discman (this thing was legit!) and punched the track button till I heard the soon-to-be-familiar feedback swell of "Call It in the Air". Through pummeled power chords I heard a raspy Jim Adkins sing, "Leave home today / Escape your region" (I think that's what he sings, he's so hard to understand on that song). I instantly felt an aching yet compelling nostalgia that I hadn't felt since I heard "My Name is Jonas" for the first time; frankly, it frightened me. You see, at the time -- and throughout most of my junior and senior high school experience -- I was obsessed with Weezer. And any other band capable of evoking a feeling that I had only previously felt with Weezer was clearly a threat. I mean, think about it, if Jimmy Eat World became my new favorite band, then Weezer wouldn't be my favorite band anymore. Yeah, it seems silly now, but this is a legitimate concern to any 8th grader.

In the back of my mind and in my brother's CD case Jimmy Eat World loomed as a constant threat; but, the coup d'etat never came. Toward the end of 9th grade Spencer introduced me to JEW's first big label release, Static Prevails. This album taught me that it was possible to like another band as much as Weezer. And what's more, I learned that it was OK if I liked another band more than Weezer.

Throughout high school Jimmy Eat World and Weezer traded places as my favorite bands, much like the way Neptune and Pluto trade places as the most distant planet from the sun (mind you, this was before Pluto was demoted to a lowly dwarf planet). On November 21, 1998 (I only remember this because it was my younger brother's birthday) my mom dropped me off -- along with three friends, Jeff, Devyn and Erich -- at Tempe Bowl (R.I.P.) for my first Jimmy Eat World concert. We didn't know the concert started at 9:00; we thought it started at 7:00 (rookie mistake) so we ended up hanging out in the bowling alley for two hours. We also ended up not having to pay because of that, so naïveté was to our benefit. I don't remember much of the concert, I just remember on the way home hearing Neil Diamond's "Girl You'll Be a Woman Soon" for the first time on the way home in my mom's car. The chorus was so easy to remember the four of us were singing along in no time.

A few months later in '99 Clarity was released. One of Spencer's best friends was dating one of the members of JEW's sister so I had been listening to demos of this album a few weeks before it was released. Right after the album came out JEW did a show at a now defunct venue in Tempe called the Green Room. It was a small venue so tickets were selling out fast. I promptly made a trip to Stinkweeds (R.I.P. Tempe location) and they were sold out of tickets. I went to Eastside Records and purchased the remaining 10 or so tickets for my friends and I. The next day at school I was accosted by an angry Kevin Williams who apparently had gone to Stinkweeds and Eastside right after me only to find out tickets were sold out. Sorry Kevin and friends.

Here in Idaho, I meet plenty of fellow students who live near Rexburg and take trips home for the weekend, be they from SLC or another city an Idaho. Being from Arizona, I've never had the luxury of a weekend trip home. So when I went home at the beginning of the month it seemed kind of silly. But it's not every day that Jimmy Eat World goes on tour playing Clarity in its entirety. Going wasn't a question of if, it was a matter of when and how I would be getting there.

As a special treat -- as if to make this concert a veritable blast from the past -- JEW called out of retirement No Knife, a long since departed band who had toured with JEW in their Static-Clarity days.

It would be rare to see any band play a show where they play one of their entire albums, but it would seem even more rare for them to play one of their least commercially successful albums. The Death Cab Transatlanticism tour? Forget about it. The Weezer Pinkerton tour? In my wildest of dreams. But here was Jimmy Eat World -- truly the people's band -- giving their die-hard fans a once in a lifetime experience.

No Knife's performance was without fault; anyone would have been surprised that they had not played together in six years. As amazing as it was to hear JEW play all of Clarity, I was surprised to notice how much I enjoyed their seven song encore, which was comprised of the 7" single "What Would I Say to You Now", "No Sensitivity" from the their split with Jebidiah and hits from their successive albums. I came for Clarity but ended up enjoying the other songs just as much, and at times, more.

How rare it is to find a band that cares about their fans and their music like Jimmy Eat World does. While I can't say that JEW has overthrown =w= as my favorite-of-all-time band, in regards to musical integrity and how they treat their fans, they've definitely earned much more respect than Weezer ever will. That is, until Weezer does the blue album/Pinkerton tour. But I won't hold my breath for that one.

more than slightly

It's kind of ironic; everyone needs accountants, right? But after a fruitless job search that left me feeling at times like Murray Hewitt, as of this moment, when I graduate from college in mere weeks I'll be jobless.

But it's really not that big of a deal. Something will come up eventually.

Home's been on my mind a lot lately, partly because I was there just over a week ago and partly because it won't be long till I'm back. I've made an observation recently, which I've discussed with a few cherished friends, and I may be wrong, but it seems like when people I know -- fellow BYU-I students rather -- go home for breaks and "off semesters" they are slightly bored. And by slightly I mean more than slightly. While I am often excited to return to school, I feel I have just as much as fun at home as I do at school.

I feel a need to elaborate. I'm not sure what the rest of the U.S. and A. is like because I spent the better part of my preteen to adult life residing in Mesa, Arizona. And the thing about Mesa and its surrounding environs is that no one leaves. It's true. I'm pretty sure about 90% of my AZ friends were born and raised there. I'm pretty sure a proportionate percentage of the percentage just mentioned plan on staying there. And of those who do leave, a similar, well, maybe slightly lower percentage plan on coming back. (This is part of the reason why I'm very glad I left AZ for school.) I myself, while I'm a transplant to the greater Phoenix metropolitan area (I was born in SLC, spent my younger formative years in Colorado), plan on "ending up" there (which might happen sooner than I had hoped). What's more, more than a handful of my AZ friends are married and starting to settle down -- deepening their roots if you will (and I think you will). That said, it's for this reason that going home is always enjoyable: a great number of my friends still live there.

Oh yeah, and we have cool things like record stores, plentiful amazing restaurants, used book stores, and band shows.

Job or no job, I have a lot to be excited about.

To my fellow Rexburgians, the Family if you will (and again, I think you will): I really don't know what to say. I want to write something touching about how much you've meant to me and how great you are but I know I won't realize how much I appreciate and love you till I leave (sadly, that's just how I roll). So, I'm gonna leave that for another post at a later date. But trust me, I do care about you all and I will miss you (some more than others). For now, just know that you've woven a permanent thread into -- to quote that overzealous, obnoxiously intense guy at your last testimony meeting -- "the very fibers of my being" (even though weaving is a man's game).

It's a bit past three in the morning. Thank you for reading this disjointed, overly parenthetical, superlatively hyperlinked post. Please reward yourself by downloading this fresh new Jeremy Enigk track (gratis!).

Why I miss AZ.

Amongst other things:

Before I came to Idaho for school I was in a band in AZ called xyzebra. We broke up when I left and Whit, our guitarist/singer, started a new band called The Great Migration. They're just the right mixture of indie, folk, and rock; Whit is a fantastic songwriter. Anyway, I was listening to some of their demo tracks on myspace just now. I forgot how awesome they are. You really should check them out here.

Anyway, I started looking through some old pictures and thought I'd post a few. Some of you readers don't know these fellas. They've been my best friends since high school and love and miss them dearly. Most of these pics are circa '04-'06.


Devyn taking over on maracas. As good a friend as anyone could ever have.


Rocking the bumblebass.


A candid moment with Jeff and Trev. Hopefully they'll forgive me for posting this. This was probably our third or fourth show.


This is one of the few shots I have with all four of us.


This is Whit.