Sunday, October 11, 2009

the grass is always greener

Be it known that I do like Colorado. Although my relationship with her has been at times adversarial.
+I have really great friends here, the type I normally might not have befriended otherwise. For example, my friend Sara was in my singles ward in Arizona for a while; we never really talked to each other then because we had our own groups of established friends. I move to Colorado and she's in my ward and we've become good friends. Small world. Interestingly, most of my close friends here are from Arizona and Idaho. The others have either lived in Arizona or are thinking about moving there.
+I've learned a lot about the military... Colorado Springs is a military town, home to Fort Carson (Army), Peterson Air Force Base (Air Force, duh), and the US Air Force Academy. One of my good friends is a green beret and two more are Air Force cadets. It's interesting to hear their take on Iraq and other military matters.
+The weather in the summer is (mostly) fantastic.
-The weather this weekend has been nothing short of terrible. I spent about an hour collectively today and yesterday scraping ice off my car -- the first sign of what is supposed to be a 'long winter'.
+I have a job that pays me money. I'm lucky and grateful to have one because some people don't.
-I don't always love my job.
-My options for grad school in Colorado Springs are pretty limited -- UCCS (doesn't have the degree I want) and various online universities (not my style).
-I'm 12 hours from home. SLC is nine hours away but that's a lot of driving time to justify a weekend road trip.
+I get to do a bit of travelling for work.
+I've been able to explore hobbies and interests I might not have taken as much time for elsewhere. (I kinda wanna learn to sew... amongst other things.)
-I've met very few people who share my enthusiasm for music, at least when it comes to live shows and/or the kind of music I prefer. And all the good shows are in Denver... going alone + long drive = less likely that I'll end up going.
-Interesting girls are few and far between and/or they go to school somewhere else and are just in town for the summer (which is now over).
+Casa Bonita is only an hour away.
+Denver is growing on me. And it's a pretty cheap airport to fly out of.
+Colorado Springs has some of the best thrifts stores I've been to in years. I could devote, and have considered doing so, an entire blog post to my amazing thrift store finds. From cameras to t-shirts to turntables to dishes to just about everything else. And most are half-off on Saturdays.

I really, really, really miss Arizona and Idaho. Yes, Idaho too. It's strange... because some of the things that I dislike about both places have become endearing now that I'm not there to hate them. Arizona is insanely hot in the summer, then just 'normal' hot in the fall and spring... but, you know what to expect -- your travel plans are never upset due to weather and you never have to scrape ice off your car. Rexburg is a one thrift-store town devoid of record stores and authentic foreignness but its petit size makes for a great social environment. Somehow the things you hated have become the things you now miss.

I just wonder what I'll end up loving about Colorado that I just don't like right now. Leaving my college life behind was one of the most soul-mangling experiences of my life and it continues to be so, though to a (much) lesser degree. But the self-discovery and growth (hopefully permanent) that have come as a result is so invaluable.

Ultimately, I wonder if this is a pit stop on my way to somewhere else or if this is the 'somewhere else'. I wonder if I should be planting roots or getting to ready to sow elsewhere. Because sometimes the grass is always greener but sometimes it really is greener.

5 comments:

  1. I like the little +'s and -'s.
    Idaho misses you, too!

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  2. I think I'm in the same position of trying to figure out if I am somewhere else or on my way to somewhere else. Being grown up is weird

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  3. I know that this is far off in the future, but I'm planning a little visit to Denver in April. I hope you will still be around.
    This is a good list. I'm glad that you are able to see pros and cons. I'VE ALWAYS SAID IT, MYKE OLSEN IS AN OPTISMIST!

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  4. Thanks, Amy!

    Quinn, let's become independently wealthy and scour the world till we find out where the grass really is the greenest.

    Zach, I should still be in Colorado in April. That'd be awesome to see a show or something in Denver. I've been to some pretty awesome record stores up there too.

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  5. why didn't I read this before you came?

    you are such an interesting fellow.

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