Tuesday, October 28, 2008

I choo-choo-choose you!

Maybe you're like me and you're a little disappointed with both of the candidates for the presidential election only a week away. Honestly, if America is a land of choice and freedom why do we only really have two options when it comes to choosing our president? It's quite ironic. My lack of excitement about this election's candidates got me thinking of people who I'd rather for . . . .


Most likely my first choice. Not only did he serve as a general in Clone Wars but Obi Wan "Our Only Hope" Kenobi was an invaluable member of the Jedi Council; there's no doubt this Jedi Master knows how to be a leader. Furthermore, he was one of two Jedi to survive Emperor Palpatine's Jedi extermination order, and when he was finally done in by his former apprentice he became "more powerful than you can possibly imagine". Luke Skywalker is the obvious choice for Kenobi's running mate. While a great military commander in his own right -- he destroyed the Death Star and turned one of the galaxy's most traitorous Sith Lords away from the dark side, even before actually beginning his career as a Jedi -- Skywalker truly represents the everyday working man, his own roots planted in the moisture farms of Tatooine. Not only would they bring order to our country, but to the entire galaxy as well.


Tom Joad is the protagonist of John Steinbeck's classic The Grapes of Wrath. We first meet Tom on the road to meet his family after serving four years of a seven year sentence in the state penitentiary on charges of manslaughter. Tom's case was clearly a matter of self defense, having been stabbed by the man he would beat to death with a shovel. Tom would fight with equal fierceness and without mercy to protect and defend the ideals and morals upon which this country was founded. Samuel Hamilton of Steinbeck's East of Eden is Joad's complementary running mate; Hamilton's calm, collected, considerate manner is the perfect balance to Joad's hotheadedness.


I know I know, neither of them are American but my other candidates are either from another galaxy or literary characters, so why not nominate "New Zealand's fourth most popular guitar-based digi-bongo acapella-rap-funk-comedy folk duo"? They probably wouldn't do much for our country; in fact, we probably wouldn't have much of a military, thanks to their "blondes not bombshells" policy. To be honest, I just think it'd be cool to see Jemaine and Bret in the White House. And Murray Hewitt would probably end up in their cabinet; it'd be silly not to put his great managing skills to work for our country.


  1. based solely on your descriptions i'm totally in for Kenobi/Skywalker. may the force be with us all.

  2. I would gladly vote for Clement/McKenzie! I subscribe to their war policy. ;)

    Seriously though, I voted the other day and I found myself voting for the propositions first. Prop 2 and Prop 8 were easy decisions compared to who to vote for president!
    Honestly, I don't subscribe to political parties and I didn't like any of the names on the ballot therefore I used my "other" bubble and line and wrote in "Revolution." -What a waste of a vote in my first presidential election.

    I think I need take of myself and do what I can to ensure my security and not rely on some man that I don't want to vote for.

  3. Every solider would be really happy if we picked Jermaine and Bret. They'd get to replace their guns with women.

    I'd still go Kenobi/Skywalker though.

    By the way, the word verfication is "crailess." That almost sounds like an actual word...one without crai? I don't know.

  4. Kenobi/Skywalker ticket and just for kicks throw Palin in somewhere on the cabinet

  5. I'd vote Kenobi as long as we're talking Alec Guinness era Kenobi. Experience!

  6. Kenobi/Skywalker. I've written two papers (8th grade..and two semesters ago) on the religious symbolism in Star Wars; specifically on Luke as an allegorical Christ figure. Just sayin...

  7. Afton -- May it indeed. I'm excited for our Star Wars-a-thon this winter.

    Harper -- Yeah, voting seems pointless at times but if we all had that attitude then it really would be.

    Cody -- Craie in French means chalk. Chalkless. That's what it was trying to say.

    Christian -- Glad you're on the Kenobi/Skywalker team.

    Trev -- Even if it were Ewan McGregor Kenobi he'd still have more experience than Obama.

    Leah -- I would like to read those papers.

  8. Do you think Jermaine and Bret would appoint that sexy hermaphrodite lady-man-lady? With its sexy lady bits, and its man bits too, it could unite the nation!

  9. Alright guys--emergency cabinet meeting...