Saturday, March 12, 2011

I wanted to have a line from a Lady Gaga song as this title but I don't know too many of her songs, so I couldn't come up with one that fit

I rarely remember my dreams. But last night I had a dream that I was being held hostage by Lady Gaga. Which was almost as memorable as the time Carl Winslow tried to eat me.

Everyone knows -- and it's well established in the hit documentary dream film Inception -- that you never really have an explanation for how you get to the place you're at in your dream -- your dream just starts there. This dream was no different. I'm alone at my mom's old house that she just sold. It's the middle of the night and I'm in the family room. The lighting in the house reminds me of Christmastime when we'd turn off all the lights and leave on the the Christmas tree lights on. (Sigh.) Except there is no Christmas tree.

I'm sitting by the fireplace. In the fireplace there is an egg carton. Don't ask me how, but somehow I know that in the egg carton there is a bomb. And somehow I know that this bomb was planted by Lady Gaga, and unless she gets what she wants, she will detonate the bomb.

Her demands are that I deface a rare original painting by painting over it. The painting I'm supposed to ruin is by John Steinbeck. I oblige her and paint a clown over the painting and it looks pretty darn good. Deep down inside I must know it's not a big deal that I paint over this supposedly rare painting; it has to be fake because homeboy Steinbeck was not a painter, he was a writer. So really, the joke is on Gaga.

At that point Lady Gaga herself shows up. I'm disappointed to see her wearing a frumpy maroon t-shirt and faded mom jeans with her hair in a pony tail. I mean, it's Lady Gaga. When has she ever looked like she could blend into a crowd? Disappointing.

That's all I remember of the dream.

Naturally, I was curious what this all could mean. So I consulted Everything was so vague -- any old interpretation could fit -- so I dismissed it. But I woke up singing "Bad Romance" to myself. So here's the simplest -- and most likely -- explanation for this dream: I was incepted to have Lady Gaga stuck in my head.


  1. I feel like Lady Gaga is holding me hostage every time I have to hear or see her.

  2. the painting aspect leads me to assume there is something ominously Dorian Gray about all of this...which, they could probably make a movie out of that book and have Lady Gaga star in it and it would work out really well. Dorian Gaga. done and done...

  3. What I love about your blog--all the literary and modern themes linked in one. Gaga, Steinbeck and Oscar Wilde. Wow. You hang with an elite crowd.